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Home Ed: Expectation V Reality
This blog is a little different from my normal posts. I thought, just for a change-up I'd do a 'versus' blog. I think many home ed families would relate to it at one point or another and I think I've been doing it for just about enough time to have a good grasp on it. I'm listing my top 5 Expectation 'V' Reality.
So let's start!
EXPECTATION: "The kids will be so much happier all the time"
REALITY: The kids may be happier that they aren't being forced to go to school anymore for whatever reason, but it doesn't mean they'll be beaming with joy every day. They'll still get bored, stroppy, annoyed and whiney just like every other mainstream kid. But the good thing is that you can be there for them if they are having a hard time (whatever they might be going through) and not have to worry about what's going on in the playground as you do when they're at school.
EXPECTATION: "We can go out all the time, whenever we want and visit loads of places"
REALITY: Outings = Empty wallet. Getting to places costs money and getting into places cost money. A free day out at the seaside with a picnic doesn't stay free. If you don't live near to a beach or live in a seaside town then your first cost is getting there and if you don't have a car you can triple the amount it costs to travel by train and bus. Once you're there it's funfair rides, candy floss, arcades, donkey rides, novelties and keepsakes to take home, icecreams and a bag of chips. Of course, you could say no to everything mentioned but you know you won't.
Let say you go to a free museum and take a picnic. It still costs to get there, the kids will probably want something from the gift shop and at some point, you'll run out of drinks which means at least £12-£15 for everyone to have a drink in the cafe, in which case you may as well go to McDonald's and all have junk-food dinner treat. You can keep it cash free but trust me, picnics in the forest and trips to the park get very samey very quickly so you'll have to be super inventive to keep it interesting. Easier with younger children, not so much with tweens and teens.
EXPECTATION: "The kids will have time to be creative and excel with their hobbies and interests"
REALITY: Yes they will have the time, whether they actually use the time to do those things is another matter. I still have to give my bunch a proverbial shove to get their butts off the sofa or peel their eyes away from a screen of some sort. Some children will lock onto something and run with it and I do believe that the earlier you start home education the easier it is for children to make their own entertainment and be naturally creative. As I have found, school seems to have squashed the natural curiosity and play element out of my kids and many others. It's quite sad really.
EXPECTATION: "We can all learn things together as a family".
REALITY: Yeah, sure you can, but finding things to continuously learn together gets tricky and often costly. The idea of joining a club or class can be exciting. Judo, roller skating, cake decorating, first aid etc. But just watch how quickly your pennies disappear. If you want to do things together, make sure it isn't going to end up costing the earth. My experience of this is when I started going roller-skating with my 2 girls once a week. It costs £15 in total which includes skate hire for an hour and a half in a gym sports hall, not even a full-sized skating rink. Plus we only stay there for 40mins, 1 hour tops, just because it gets tedious. That's £60 per month for less than 4 hours skating. Thankfully the youngest stopped wanting to go because she couldn't get to grips with it and the oldest got bored of it. So if you want to do new things together as a family, find something that won't require you to sell a kidney to fund it.
EXPECTATION: "We'll meet loads of new home ed families and the kids will make lots of new friends"
REALITY: In my experience, no, no you won't. You might attend home ed groups or go on trips but you can't force friendships. I've been to home ed groups that are very snobby and if you haven't been home edding since the beginning then you're not a "true" home ed family and you will not be accepted. We've also been to other groups where the parents are very friendly but the kids aren't so welcoming. If you have very shy or quiet children (Like we do) or children with SEN it will/may be even harder for them to integrate and make new friends. Plus if you don't drive it can be difficult/impossible to get the groups.
So, there we are. My Top 5, Expectation V Reality.
How many can you relate to? xx